Happiness doesn't matter as much as we think it does

〰️ To be happy in life should never be a goal. 〰️

So many times I see people judge themselves based on how happy they are.

✨Let’s make it real: on a scale from 1-10, 10 being the happiest possible, how happy are you right now? Write down this number and repeat every day for a week.✨

If you don’t guess it already, you will certainly notice after a while of doing the above exercise, that happiness fluctuates.

Yes, that’s correct - HAPPINESS IS NO CONSTANT.

Happiness follows a cycle that alternates with a negative counterpart like sadness, anger, frustration...

〰️ If you find yourself at a moment of your happiness scale at a 2 or 3 and you think « I’m a failure », « Whatever I do is wrong », « I’m a mess », « I’m broken », « I’m doing something wrong », or similar, then you are buying into the completely wrong and naive belief system, that happiness is something one can attain and once reached it will always stay there. Then you believe that once you are healed, successful, emotionally stable, spiritual enlightened — you will feel happy like all the freaking time. 〰️

Don’t get fooled - happiness follows the natural cyclical laws of the universe. It is a « positive » emotion, followed by a « negative » emotion. To believe you should only be happy, suppresses the natural flow of life, denies that life is everything — the good and the bad.

Striving for the infinite happiness will ALWAYS create a feeling of not « having » or not « being » enough. The perfect breeding ground for advertising to implement messages of consumerism into your subconscious. You are at your most vulnerable in the feeling of scarcity and buy into anything that promises abundance.

〰️ A « positive » situation is in the bigger picture of all life no different than a « negative » situation. After all, it is us that have labeled « positive » and « negative ». A situation, a feeling, an emotion, a circumstance — it just is. It just is that what it is. We don’t need to judge it. We can simply observe, watch, act and get on with life. 〰️

✨ All emotions are cyclical and whether positive or negative have the same value and worth to be part of our lives.✨

Don’t judge yourself for how happy you are. If you are extremely happy, just enjoy the feeling knowing it will soon be alternated with something else. And that too shall pass.

〰️ However, there is a state of being every single one of us can cultivate and learn. A consciousness that eventually leads to inner peace and deep acceptance, a strength and resilience that will nurture through the darkest despair and be present at the highest bliss — this consciousness is called gratitude. 〰️ More about how to tap into the feeling of gratitude and make it a constant in your life in my next post. 🤗✨

Sonia Sarina Birrer